America – you’ve sent zombies to us again.

I was going to rant about how crap America is in the wake of their AAA status being downgraded, but I don’t really need to point out the obvious, too much. They suck and they are going to send us all to the poorhouse. It’s obviously time to buy some guns and get a steel explosion-proof door fitted to my house.

What is the etiquette in this situation? I know there are no riots here in Perth as yet, but I’ve seen those yobs down at theZombie Child: Do not let them in either. pub, they are itching to start something. They don’t understand econo-speak so PLEASE don’t any of you try to explain it to them, they’ll get angry about whatever it is, and then when they all get drunk and forget what inflation means, they’ll just blame some celebrity or say that the Guvmint did it. Apparently a nice side effect of this USA thing is that interest rates will probably come down. But when you factor in that all those rioting losers will lose their jobs and probably don’t own houses, it doesn’t really matter. [Read more…]

What is “news” again?

Just a quick one.

If you are anything like me, and I think you are; you will search the term “weird world news” every now and then. Am I right? Well I just did that, and when I saw a leading news provider had such a page, I thought, Whoa! this is going to be good.

What did I find? No unsolved spooky murders, no kids that speak in tongues, not even Jesus on a bicycle in mexico.  The whole page was devoted to viral web videos.  Titles like “Adorable kid sings motivational song” and “Barfing cup is a metaphor for life” are NOT NEWS, NO MATTER HOW YOU LOOK AT IT.

 

I know news is a contentious issue. Some people think that a cat up a tree is news. I do not. I think a cat up a tree that has been killing the townsfolk with laser beam eyes is news, but a video of one rubbing it’s eyes is not.

For shame “trusted news site”. All I wanted was a little mystery in my day. I’m so sick of all the real news.

FYI: On the home page I found what I was looking for; “Kangaroo beats up 94 year old woman”